Posted on by sarahmichellelynch

Life As Art

How do you teach an old dog new tricks?

One thing I’ve been more proactive about this year is reading. I’ve read at least a hundred times more this year than I’ve written and it’s changed the way I write, for sure. In the past it has been the other way round… I mean I did write a trilogy while I was nursing and teaching my daughter to walk!

It’s true that we never stop learning and mostly, through other people. It’s like this quote I saw from Neil Gaiman today which was half the reason I thought to write this blog:

81d7aa44046666955abb0500fddee2cf

When you start out as a writer you are writing mostly for the love of writing but as you progress, you begin to realise how your work can be sharpened. As you write and write, and read and read, you eventually start to do a lot of things without even thinking about it anymore. You evolve into the writer you’re meant to be and you know which of the rules your writing can break. It gets so that the writing is both second nature and craft.

So, how do we go back to basics after writing so many novels where we’ve explored all the tricks and now need to narrow them down to get across that one, simple story that embodies “Life As Art”. I’m talking about an effortless narrative that tells you what is happening while drawing out all the nuances of two people, their two worlds and everything that makes those worlds unique and singular. It’s not a bad thing, but sometimes we forget there is beauty in simplicity and containment, in the ordinary. It’s a craft because you’re telling a story that gives a reader the tools to imagine the rest. This is where being a prolific reader yourself comes into it.

That Audience

A good book doesn’t betray the effort that has gone into one sentence, one paragraph, one whole chapter even. That’s because you did your research and you wrote that story with faith. It’s a squarely constructed piece that has a theme and you ran with it. You believe in what you’re putting out there because you know you have an audience. At the end of the day, it’s great to write a story and have it out there, but are you writing for an audience? Are you giving people what they want? Yes, there are stories that break all the rules and do that well, for one reason or another. Maybe because at the heart, there is some kind of truth that so many people can still relate to.

Life As Art

Surf beneath the mundane surface and so much more unveils itself. If you’ve studied your characters in depth before you’ve written them, you can put them in any situation and know what they’re going to do—how they may react. Fictional characters are great though… you can stretch them that little bit further. You can also fit twenty years’ worth of history into just one year, maybe even one month. Squeeze time down, and maybe, you can make that book feel much longer and lengthier than just that one lifetime even. The truth is, writing is a unique “occupation” and there is no exact science. Sometimes there is no rhyme or reason to why we write this, or why we write that.

My point is, you have to keep writing. Writing is learning and expressing and discovering. I’m learning that all the time. I’m still learning and I think I am finally getting close to the holy trinity of a writer’s aspirations… to be my own, individual self and be pretty bloody pleased with that.

Unbind is now available for pre-order, RELEASED OCTOBER 20TH

http://mybook.to/Unbind

teaser

Posted on by sarahmichellelynch

The UNITY quadrilogy is complete

Ribbet collage

mybook.to/theradical
mybook.to/theinformant
mybook.to/theoperator
mybook.to/thesentient

If you enjoyed The Hunger Games, Divergent, perhaps even Utopia, this might be a series for you! This is a futuristic world and the premise is the world is 40 years clear of pandemic – but a conglomeration which took advantage of the devastation is still in charge… and guess what… they had something to do with the virus escaping!

This is a series of sex, lies, deceit, family, conspiracy, action, chase, adventure, love, strong characters, villains and assassins! It’s a series I’m in love with – I hope you check it out!

Peace out.

Posted on by sarahmichellelynch

FREE to download to KINDLE

the radicalIn the first instalment of S.M. Lynch’s dystopian adult romance series…

The year is 2063 and Big Brother has control; 40 years previously Officium took over global intelligence, government, supply and policing. In the wake of viral disaster they offered to return the world to order, but at a cost.

New York journalist Seraph Maddon has been trying to link the death of her British parents to the group that has rinsed the world of all hope – but more than ten years of investigations have turned up nothing. It is only when she leaves her job behind to travel to England for a funeral that she starts to unpick her family’s involvement in a movement known as UNITY.

Someone intends Seraph to cross paths with Dr Ryken Hardy and when they meet, it is not long before they are running for their lives – their combination a significant threat to those who believe themselves beyond surveillance.

Seraph’s rollercoaster journey of reawakening and newfound love is a battle to finally break free of the shackles of oppression. Secrets and lies are the norm amongst a frightened population and the truth may be best kept hidden.

But someone is determined… the truth will out, for better or worse…

The story continues in UNITY Vol.2, THE INFORMANT

EXCERPT

“All we know is that we were born into corruption and madness and that nothing can move forward until the veil is lifted. Knowledge is freedom, and if the world knew the truth for a certainty, I’m sure people would rise up against Officium finally. But without definitive proof, we can do nothing. We need hard evidence otherwise anything else might send panic through the population again. I know one thing for sure at least, they will stop at nothing to keep the truth hidden…”

UK: http://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B00JBLZZAE

US: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00JBLZZAE

CA: http://www.amazon.ca/dp/B00JBLZZAE

UNIVERSAL LINK:

YOU CAN ALSO GET VOLUME TWO ON SALE: myBook.to/theinformant

Posted on by sarahmichellelynch

Another instalment in the saga…

Two years ago when I was pondering whether or not to self-publish my first book, I had no idea how my work would be received. No idea. When people texted/emailed me to say they couldn’t put it down and were in love with the characters, I just didn’t believe it. Couldn’t believe it. To me, writing was just something I enjoyed and that others enjoyed it was such a bonus. I didn’t know it would lead me on to write a book like A Fine Profession, nor A Fine Pursuit or Angel Avenue, which have been so well received since then. And the journey continues, the development is ongoing…

Today THE INFORMANT went live on Amazon. I am not going mad promoting it yet. I will do however when Volume 4 comes out. Then I will go mad. The reversions of what was the Ravage Trilogy, to me, signal the end of this stage of my creative development and the beginning of something new. It was only today I went to give a talk on self-publishing and had a potential pack of ten or more writers ready to put their work in my hands to edit and publish. I owe a lot to that first novel. I wouldn’t be here now without it.

Anyway, what I can tell you (without spoiling the plot) is that when I was writing these sci-fi novels, I was a new mum. Many of you know that. I was writing for the first time and it is only natural that a lot of my new concerns in life came to the fore in those novels. Also, a lot of people that came and went in my life, and those still with me, manifested in some respects in those early works that were more me than I think anything else ever will be.

It is sci-fi. Yet it has such a romantic edge. These are just stories that can take you away from this place. One major theme in the UNITY series is motherhood. I guess that will always stand prominent in any work of mine. You see my own mother was fostered when she was four and didn’t have it easy. My husband’s mum lost her mother when she was eight. That wasn’t the beginning of it for either of our mums. Both my mum and Andy’s mum strived so hard to give us what they never had. When I had a child too, so much hit me. I am sure so many other mums here and elsewhere can relate to that. UNITY is not only about a virus attack – it is about friendships, lovers, connections, relationships… it’s about alcoholism, abuse and how our imbedded personalities define us – all against this mad background of threat and suspicion, fear and longing. Dive in. I dare you!

Click covers to buy or visit unitynovels.com to find out more!!!

the radicalthe informant

Posted on by sarahmichellelynch · 2 Comments

Prologue – THE INFORMANT!!!!

the informantOUT THIS WEEK!!

This is the sequel to THE RADICAL and promises to be explosive, action-packed, full of romance, intrigue and surprises galore!

To buy THE RADICAL… GO HERE!!!

READ ON FOR THE INFORMANT PROLOGUE…

January 2064

Mine was a life unlike all the others’. How bold a statement, you may say. Yet quite true. The rest thrived off reputation and hearsay whereas me, Camille Honoré, needed no reputation to prove how much of a threat to Officium I was. Nothing they had thrown at me had killed me. They had tried numerous times. I had kept my head down yet they knew of my conquests. My name was still synonymous with threat.

I sat in a bedroom in Paris, with these thoughts all swirling around my head. I looked out over the expansive rear gardens of Seraph’s new purchase: a house. The place needed a great deal of work and the gardens were more junkyard than recreational space, but I could see she believed in a possible transformation. I’d complain about the seals, the safety locks, the roof and she would smile and return, ‘It has potential.’

I loved her enthusiasm. Even after all that had transpired, she saw something good in everything. I knew it was because she had been to rock bottom and come back again that she didn’t take anything for granted. I had learnt that same lesson myself.

The strain of the past few months had driven me to the odd cigarette and I puffed on one out of the window so she wouldn’t see my vulnerability. Me, yes, me Camille Honoré, who was meant to be beyond all these earthly pleasures. Yet the past nine months had nearly killed me. Why? I could admit the reasons but only to myself. It knew it would take more than retrospect and reflection before I would be able to digest it with anyone else.

Seraph and her “condition” put a spanner in the works, let’s say. A touch of nausea on a certain Dakota apartment balcony was the whole damn reason why nine months had nearly killed me…

I was digressing. Getting sloppy. Allowing emotions to get the better of me. How crass. I forgot Camille Honoré does not admit she has the potential to die, when in fact she has more than the potential. I was just as fallible as the rest, if not more, though I was better at hiding it.

We thought Ryken had successfully paved the way for a resurgence. When in actual fact, no.

“Fuck him,” I whined to myself.

I blamed Eve for teaching me swear words. I blamed her for a lot of things actually. She had passed on and left me with a shit load of problems to mop up, sweep away, tuck under the carpet… (insert other archaisms here).

I was dealing with a mountain of logistical nightmares in fact and no amount of swearing would make me feel any better. Nothing was going to sway me from my feeling that the proverbial was going to hit the fan before long.

He damn well forgot to wear a prophylactic. Nothing but mayhem would ensue because of that one, silly, neglectful action.

I finished the cigarette and took out a mint, spraying myself with scented water too. Perfume would have her licking my face with the heightened sense of smell she had.

A ding from my xGen arrested me and I inwardly recoiled. What now? I told them all to leave me alone. I am not in the mood.

I had retired myself, I suppose, to a certain extent. I had left my no.1 in charge at the shop and had come to Paris with Seraph in a bid to start fresh, breathe away the cobwebs and reconnect with who I used to be. That thought made me chuckle inwardly: who I used to be…

I recalled a little French girl, treated like a princess by her parents, strolling the streets with her mamma, seeking shoes from stalls that would inscribe your name inside and make it all the more magical to have something that was entirely your own. How fantastical. How whimsical. How nothing of that little girl remained in the powerful machine that had replaced her.

I picked up my xGen and saw a message. I saw the sender and heat flooded my body. Heat rose in my cheeks. She still had that affect on me. It read, ‘Got time for a chat? Only a quick one.’

‘Sure,’ I replied, unable to help myself.

She called within a minute and I froze when I saw her. She was all blackness and I loved it. The darkness within her contrasted with the lightness in me. Though what she knew, and only she, was that my depths ran darker and deeper than most others’ – and in that respect we were a perfect fit.

‘How are you?’ she asked with concern.

‘Shit,’ I replied. I never swore. She knew that meant it was bad.

‘He is on his way?’ she asked tentatively.

‘Yes, he is,’ I mumbled.

‘Do you want me to come over?’

‘No,’ I told her, my lips pursed.

‘I don’t like the way you look,’ she argued.

‘How should I look? Pleased?’

I was more miffed than I had ever been.

There was a very valid reason for Ryken’s disappearance off the face of the planet and now I feared all this sacrifice, all this struggle, would be for nothing.

‘You can tell me what is going on in that head of yours. If it will help to unburden you, you may as well.’

I sniffed. I shook my head and rambled quickly in French, quicker than even she could understand. I went into my roughest dialect, my street tongue, and she gawped as I reeled off a lot of jargon.

‘Don’t be such a child and just tell me,’ she chastised.

‘Huh,’ I harrumphed, sitting down on my bed with her on my lap. I had to think of Seraph and her talk of piles earlier… anything to take my mind off the beauty of the woman opposite me.

I cogitated and twisted my mouth before admitting, ‘You haven’t been here when she cries in the night. You haven’t seen her…’ I paused, my mouth twisting uncomfortably while I tried to combat my emotions, ‘…talking like she is happy when she isn’t, not really. She is only pretending… when really she is so sad, she can barely get out of bed in the morning.’

‘Camille, you always knew it would be this way.’

‘Oh, yes, yes,’ I laughed in a trite manner, ‘oh that’s right. Camille follows orders, that is what she does.’

‘This is not you speaking, who is this creature?’ she demanded, her eyes narrowing.

‘I am so tired of this,’ I moaned.

‘You cannot let emotion get the better of you. Not when we have a traitor amongst us.’

‘Ha, a traitor! That is a laugh, is it not? We are all traitors to ourselves. We are human and still we convince ourselves we have no feelings… just to get the job done.’

‘If you don’t bloody tell me what is wrong, right this instant, I am going to come over there to knock some damn sense into you!’

‘That traitor as you term them… that thing who proclaims to be a person, well… my spies tell me things I don’t like to hear. Things that mean this whole sham could have been for nothing! Nothing!’

‘I am coming,’ she warned.

‘No. I don’t need you adding to my problems as well. I already have too many people on the watch list, thank you very much.’

‘A few more days, Camille,’ she comforted me, ‘and Seraph will not be so vulnerable. Just a few more days.’

A few more days, a few more months, a few more years… they had piled up and robbed my life, those “calculations of time” that meant shit. This fight felt like it would never be over.

I wanted to tell my counterpart that she had no idea of the real legacy the Operator had left behind. Secrets nobody but me knew. Some so terrible… some days I had to break skin on the punch bag to rid myself of the guilt I sometimes felt. Me, Camille Honoré, breaking skin. Oh Jesus. Who was I kidding? I was just a woman too. No plan, no motive. Just a woman.

‘I will come if you want me to,’ she added. Oh I bet you would…

‘Non, I don’t want you here,’ I insisted in a harsh voice.

‘Well, chin up. You never know, you might get to kick some more ass before long.’

I looked into her eyes and couldn’t help but crack a wry grin. That had me perked up. She was never easily offended, never gave up on me. She knew just how to appeal to my sense of humor.

‘She’s back, there she is, Camille is in the room again,’ she beamed.

I heard the door to Seraph’s room open after her nap and nodded towards Mara, whispering, ‘Got to go.’

She mouthed, ‘Okay.’

We ended the call and I heard Seraph yell from the corridor, ‘My back’s fuckin’ killin’!’

I chuckled inwardly. Seraph didn’t know how alike she and Eve had been. I had to hope she would never know the extent of the truth in that.

The Radical revealed her place in this tale, now I will unveil mine. Maybe I was the Principal first and foremost, in the eyes of the world. But there is/was so much more to me, too.

I was the Operator’s right-hand woman and you have yet to discover the extent of our former leader’s skills… prepare to be driven deeper into the murky abyss.

Posted on by sarahmichellelynch · 2 Comments

5* review of Angel Avenue… thanks Audrina Lane

Chuffed to bits with this review!

Having read and reviewed previous novels by Sarah I couldn’t wait to read this one. And believe me it did not disappoint one bit. It has kept me company on the bus ride into work for the last week and let’s just say it was annoying when I had to get off each day when I really wanted to just keep reading!!
Jules is an interesting and engaging character, at first you wonder what she is doing standing at the same corner each Saturday? luckily it is not long before the mystery unravels and Warrick appears on the corner and into her life. Oh I wish she had been my English teacher!! Gradually Jules reveals to Warrick the story behind the street corner and as he breaks down her barriers she tells him the sad story about her past and Laurie.
With Warrick’s support she faces her past and starts to believe that she can find true love but what is Warrick hiding from her when he starts to leave in the middle of the night??
Well I hate to ruin a great story and this is one of them so I’ll just finish by saying that I loved the slight twist at the end and the way the author has dealt with the serious issue of bullying. So what are you waiting for go and buy this book and take a stroll down Angel Avenue with Jules and Warrick.

Need I say anything!?

Nope. Happy writer. 🙂

Click this link to buy!

ANGEL AVENUE ON AMAZON IN PAPERBACK OR EBOOK

Posted on by sarahmichellelynch

A poem about writing… if you like

As a prolific author I often get asked:-

  • How do you do it?
  • Why do you do it?
  • Where do you do it?
  • For how long do you do it?

You know… in not so few words but similar.

There are answers but what came to me the other day was a poem that goes some way to explaining. So here it is… and please… interpret to your heart’s content…

 

To write… a muse

by Sarah Lynch

♥

A puncture in my chest you remain

A healing embrace you also are

Yet I find it difficult to absorb you

I skim the surface because you hurt

 ♥

I see clearer when I see through you

I breathe harder when you remind me

I shake out the strength that surrounds

Cascades along my entirety in droves

 ♥

I clench a fist and it gathers there

The will of my command, my drive

The energy, not the words, escape

They explode into matter from nothing

 ♥

A dream to create, plunder and expatiate

A heart so solid, so stony though flourishes

You wild rivers you, swirling, amassing,

You gather within to expunge my self

♥

She broke the barriers, undid the bonds

She chipped me down, broke me open

She, vile and tempestuous, sought me out

Forced me to yield to her in empathy

 ♥

The lives of many explored by a scribe

The whispers of existence all at odds

The voices swirl, fold, join and mingle

To make one, loud noise.

♥

To ignore it… impossible

© Sarah Michelle Lynch

 

Posted on by sarahmichellelynch

A recent interview I did…

1. What inspired you to write your first book?

A dream first and foremost. An idea lingered in my mind for years until I finally had time to put pen to paper during a long period of maternity leave. I suppose a childhood love of literature became a lifelong obsession! I cannot imagine ever stopping writing now.

2. Writing can be a difficult job, what inspires you to keep going?

Mostly, readers. When I get an amazing reaction from one of my readers, I know something is working. Writing a book can sometimes feel lonely, desolate and doubtful. It is the possibility of the finished outcome and seeing that achievement come to fruition that spurs me on too.

3. What are you working on now?  What’s next?

At the moment I am writing/re-editing a series of science-fiction novels set in a futuristic world. The planet is struggling to cope in the wake of viral attack and love is the key to breaking a stranglehold of fear that looms over everyone.

4. What’s your writing process, schedule, or routine?

Most writers write in the wee hours, when the world is quiet and we feel quiet in our own minds too. I am no exception. Sometimes if I am close to a major breakthrough in a plot, I lock myself away for a day or two and my husband brings me cups of tea and toast intermittently, but otherwise I just write when the world lets me, or when I get an idea. Sometimes even on my Windows Phone if I am on the bus or train!

5. Who is your favorite book character of all time? Why?

That is a hard question, it really is *looks at bookshelf in a bid to seek help*. There are so many good, strong characters from books I love. There are also some baddies you have got to love too. I am trying to avoid picking one from the classics but it is inevitable… Celie from The Color Purple. It is a beautiful book I could read again and again. Her voice is so authentic and simple, yet so spiritual.

6. What advice would you give to aspiring writers?

Keep writing. Honestly. You just never know when something might click.

7. What’s your favorite quote?

How can you do this to me? Ha-ha! I will go with this one… it says it all, for me… “That is part of the beauty of all literature. You discover that your longings are universal longings, that you’re not lonely and isolated from anyone. You belong.” – F. Scott Fitzgerald

8. Who would you most like to have a cup of coffee with? (Dead or alive) Explain…

I would like to sit down with Tom Cruise and ask him why he didn’t just bloody marry me. No… actually, I would like to sit with Shakespeare and interrogate him on his work schedule, whether he really knew he would be eternally famous and how the hell did he write Romeo and Juliet without convulsing in agony like the 14-year-old version of me did? LOL. I just think it would be fascinating to see into the mind of someone like him and get a real picture of the man. He saw the spectrum of humanity and for some reason, we are still reinterpreting him all the time.

9. What is your biggest pet peeve?

Smoking. Can’t stand it. Doesn’t mean a character can’t smoke though! As long as they don’t leave their tab ends around me…

10. Tell us something quirky about you.

At school I was so much better at Maths than English. In fact I don’t think that has changed.

11. Favorite comfort food?

Burger and fries (or chips as us Brits call them J).

12. Star Wars or Star Trek?

Star Wars!

13. Sunrises or Sunsets?

Sunsets.

Posted on by sarahmichellelynch

The Beauty of Science Fiction

I recently did a guest post on another website but thought I would post this here too… it pretty much says everything I am currently going through… 😉 and it’s all good!

The Beauty of Science Fiction…

As an author of erotica and contemporary romance, plus science-fiction, I have been on all sides of the writing spectrum. Each genre has its own challenges. In fact, genre is something widely discussed amongst the Indie writing community purely because many Indies have books that don’t necessarily fall into one category and therefore have been passed over numerous times by agents and/or publishers.

When I say science-fiction, in my mind I think of Quantum Leap, Star Wars, Star Trek or The Fly (this film terrified me when I first saw it). I think of Stephen King and The Stand, another story that left a lasting impact. I think of Blade Runner, The Fifth Element and even Demolition Man (don’t beat me with a stick). There are so many other films/books/comics I love because I love science-fiction. In fact, there are so many books/films that bob under the sci-fi radar because it is a genre that is all-encompassing. Did you think The Adjustment Bureau was necessarily sci-fi? Did you think Never Let Me Go was? The Time Traveller’s Wife?  Sci-fi does not leave those who prefer more romantic stories out in the cold.

My husband and I met through a mutual love of the arts. We were sent together to a Press night to review a play for a university magazine and it turned into a story… nine years on we have a daughter and have been married almost six years. When I met him, I had no idea I was marrying into science-fiction madness. His mother is a mad Trekkie. I am talking super mad! She can name you the title of any Star Trek episode just from the first line. She dragged my husband to Star Trek conventions when he was little and he has been indoctrinated in all the various offshoots of Trek… and beyond. My own love of sci-fi was something burning deep but not on the surface. I am just a lover of great stories… aren’t we all? It was only when I started writing sci-fi that I realised what a great source I had in my husband for ideas and opinions. Thus he became my editor.

When I started writing my first novel, all I saw was a theory. I didn’t classify it as one genre or another. I knew there would be a love story at the heart but I also knew the book would be set in the future and in some respects, this already placed it in the sci-fi bracket. Yet I also had a yearning for romance and felt I had to weave this in. I needed that too. So when I was asked to write this post, I got to thinking what differentiates straight erotica, straight romance, straight sci-fi. Setting perhaps, language maybe, yet you still have to throw a lot of imagination into whatever you try to tackle, whichever genre that may be.

Erotica was something I wanted to try my hand at because it was a challenge. It is not necessarily where my heart lies. Don’t get me wrong, I love erotic stories. I didn’t love Story of O at first. In fact I hated it. However, I grew to love it and now class it as one of my favourite books. Every reading always produces another insight or a different reaction. When I finished writing a pair of erotic novels last year, I was pretty pleased with the result. Some said the books were much more than erotica. And they were. I tackled some subjects that I felt were important to explore. In fact, there are tons and tons of erotic writers out there that have written much better stuff than will ever see the bottom of a jumble sale. That is because erotica, when done right, allows us to explore emotional issues no other genre allows so easily. Erotica can be so much more than just fantasy. It can be a vehicle of exploration for how intimacy and sexual honesty between two people can be such a force of good.

So after writing two erotic novels I wrote a contemporary romance titled Angel Avenue. It was such a joy to write, so easy in fact. I wrote about exactly what I knew. It is set in my own environs and it features characters I am familiar with, or versions of real people I know and respect and love. If any writer ever tells you they are not inspired by life, they are lying. Whether directly or indirectly, we all are. We are sometimes subliminally, subconsciously, inspired by real life whether we like it or not. Anyway, it was this switch from erotica to contemporary romance that made me realise a few things. It made me realise sometimes we forget the small stuff, which can make a heck of a difference in books. It makes us connect with characters so much more.

As for the sci-fi, that very first novel I began during maternity leave almost three years ago turned into a trilogy. It spun wildly out of control and I never thought I would get any success at all from it. In fact my first novel was my first creative outing. I had never even attempted a short story before then! I just had this dream and I followed it. I explored ideas and theories until they were wrung out. The point of this article is that I have recently gone back to these books and re-written/re-edited and re-imagined them. When I went back to the drawing board after writing three romance novels, I realised just what a task I had accomplished in writing a trilogy of sci-fi books. Because as you can imagine, sci-fi sometimes requires a whole new setting to be explained and described. It asks that we IMAGINE like we never imagine with any other genre. In science-fiction anything is possible. Nothing is off the table. As a romance writer first and foremost, that was difficult for me to master at first. I constantly thought of things in terms of would this actually happen ?? When in actual fact, I should have been telling myself, this is science-fiction and anything can bloody happen! My point is, science-fiction can comfortably feature action, thriller, romance, drama, adventure and fantasy, all within a completely different world. It can comment on universal political, social, moral and ethical issues. The challenge is immense but it is one I love and relish. Nothing excites or enthrals me as much. The possibilities are endless. It is exploring the people we are, through the things we could be capable of. And that is the beauty of science-fiction.

 

Posted on by sarahmichellelynch

How your first novel shapes you…

I may be repeating myself here but it needs saying. It does need saying. Again. A lot of first novels get consigned to the bin. One bestselling author I talked to wrote five novels before he got “published”. All the others may never see the light of day. I hear Hilary Mantel wrote dozens before getting “published”. “Published”: here I am referring to getting that elusive traditional publishing deal. Many hold out for this because to be an Indie means being very brave, or simply believing you have some words people may enjoy. Many writers can probably say… we wrote something and binned it at one time or another. We went on and wrote other things that we thought were better.

My first novel was so far from perfect. In fact it was the hardest novel I ever wrote and will always be because I started writing with an idea but no notion of how to set out the threads that weaved from that initial strain. Some of you might remember me saying that I wrote it while I was on maternity leave. I look back now and with hindsight, I actually don’t know how I accomplished what I did.

One thing I refuse to do is take myself seriously. There are so many, many writers now and it is amazing if you can get a small, loyal following. If you have that, pat yourselves on the back. It is an admirable thing to get something written down let alone published, whether by traditional or any other route. I think of things in terms of my own, personal victories sometimes, because often that is enough for the time being. Now I look back, I realise there were so many times I could have given up and given in. So many points along the road where I was tired, dejected, feeling unappreciated. Wondering what the point was. Whether anybody even cared. My husband always cared but yeah, that is his job. So then… when other people started caring too… that gave me something else. A bit more of an edge. I had to tell myself “you wrote a bloody novel when you had never even written anything creative before!” It was true. Yes, I was a journalist. Yes, I had an English degree. Yes, I have a way with words… that much was clear when I returned to work after maternity to find about six people doing a job I used to do singularly. But a novel is such a different ballgame… I had written a few fictional pieces in my youth and a bit of poetry but I hadn’t even really attempted a short story before I wrote Beneath the Veil.

There has to be so much self-belief. So much self-motivation. It is such a lonely game, such a weary, lonesome road to travel. I am a humble person (I actually am!), but when it comes to self-publishing apparently showing off is essential because nobody will listen if you don’t believe in the first place! I had to change from that humble, carefree “so what, who cares” type person to what I am now, which is a forthright, “here is my book and I flipping believe in it and will fight for it” type hybrid writer/promoter! I am still learning, bloody hell don’t get me wrong, I am still learning there!

Truth was my first novel (to me, back then, when I first started writing) was just a little challenge to myself to see what I could do for myself for a change. I never anticipated what I would turn out. Not in a million years would I have been able to foresee what I could achieve without first giving it a try. I never expected what happened – to actually happen. Never.

I didn’t give up on my first novel because it was such a rush, such a monumental period of creativity I couldn’t pass up. I was taken by an idea for a future world and it took me along for the ride. I just knew I had to get it down, it was then or never. It was all ready in my mind, waiting, to be written down. Sometimes you sit having to force the words. With my first novel, I couldn’t contain them. I itched to write, to scribble, to get it all down. It is great to be able to say, “I wrote erotica that people see as more than just erotica”. But it will be even better when my science-fiction gets me more notice because in actual fact, that is more me. You see, my first words were my truest and I will always gravitate back to them.

I have spent the first part of this year revising this first novel because I felt it was time. I felt there was more. There is still more… more future novels. The reason why I went back is because the prequels have to match the sequels now. There is so much I want to tell you all, and I will, in good time.

We wouldn’t have had A Fine Profession if I hadn’t gotten over that first hurdle of the first novel. Nor would Warrick Jones be breaking hearts either, if I hadn’t carried on, kept the faith, kept writing, knuckled down. Each time I finish a novel I prepare myself for the slump and the possibility that I might not have any more in the tank. I might not have the urge to keep going. I am a realist and sometimes, it just ain’t happening. The pen does not want to move. Yet, always, when I am least looking – I find something else to do. To explore. My first novel taught me that… you start with a singular notion and you let it run riot from there. You don’t stop until you have exhausted every possibility in your mind. I learnt to stop looking to myself for the inspiration and look at the world. The “shaping a novel into a smooth ride” thing, that comes later. Worry about it then…!

More to come…